Giving yourself a break

Katherine Stone at Postpartum Progress has written a very personal and important post for any parent or guardian, not just those who have suffered from PPD. You should head over and read the whole thing, but I believe her conclusion sums it up quite nicely.

The truth is every mom does something (what's the present tense of wrought? wringing?) that could surely be used against her by her children someday in a therapy session. My son may be at a disadvantage in some way because of my illness. I'll never really know I guess. But I do know that I did my best. I do know that I sought help as soon as possible. I do know that I faked it til I made it. I do know that he's a great reader, a good swimmer, a nice big brother, a cool Lego builder, very witty and absolutely gorgeous. He knows I love him and I know he loves me, and that we're both pretty good people. That's all I've got and I need to keep hold of it. Let the chips fall where they may.

Petition for Melanie Blocker-Stokes MOTHERS Act

Via Postpartum Progress

The Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance's online petition supporting the Melanie Blocker Stokes Mothers Act for postpartum depression was up to 13,000 signers as of April 30th.

The Mothers Act is meant to:

• Encourage the Department of Health and Human Services to expand the research into the causes of postpartum conditions and find treatments.
• Establish a national public awareness campaign to increase awareness and knowledge of PPD and psychosis.
• Make grants available for programs that develop and offer essential services to women with PPD.

According to the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance there has been an on-line movement against the Act under the mistaken belief that it is a push to require new mothers to take medication when in fact it is just a push to increase funding for a better understanding of PPD, expand funding oppurtunities for those who provide PPD support services, and create new support services.

Each year more than 800,000 women develop a diagnosable postpartum mood disorder and we still no very little about the cause. Please click here and sign the petition today, it only takes a minute and it can make a big difference.

Postpartum Health Alliance

Our partner organization, Postpartum Health Alliance is gearing up for MamaFest 2008 this May.

MamaFest 2008

Join us for our annual fundraiser, MamaFest. Timed days before Mother's Day, this is your opportunity to go out with some girlfriends, do some shopping, hear interesting discussions on mom-related topics, participate in a silent auction and see films by, for and about women at the LunaFest film festival. 5:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m., Temple Solel, 3575 Manchester Ave., Cardiff by the Sea, 92007. $20 per person in advance by 4/23 ($25 at the door). For more information, visit strollerstrides.com or call 866-348-4666 or email info@strollerstrides.com. This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it.

If you're in the area you should really check it out. If you'd like to learn more about PHA or postpartum depression in general, their website is a great place to start. While you're there make sure to read PHA board member Holly Herring's article, Pregnancy Without a Plan in which she details with fearless honesty both her own struggle and the ways in which PHA helped her through a difficult time in her life. It's extremely well written and worth a read. I'll leave you with my favorite part.

Every now and then I will show up at a PPD support group meeting. I remember all too well the feelings behind those sad and frightened faces. I see these mothers with their babies and they are fighting back tears and it just hurts inside because I can relate. I KNOW how that feels. But, you know what I tell them? “You are not alone and this will end”.

PPD Prevention: Building a Support System

When possible, prevention is always the best medicine. Studies have shown that new mothers with a strong social support system in place are at much lower risk of developing significant postpartum depression than those who do not have this kind of support. At Postpartum Support International they have an essay written by RN and BSN Carolyn White entitled How You can Build Your Own Social Support Network which presents a thorough easy to understand guide to building and maintaining your social support system including surveys that you can complete to examine how you as a new mother are feeling about your experience.

The author and PSI do make it clear that this essay is meant to be preventative and that if you are currently experiencing PPD or other severe emotional symptoms, it is imperative that you consult a professional in order to receive adequate care. New mothers who are already having emotional difficulties may be too stressed out to try to begin to employ these strategies, and the thrust of the essay is the importance of reaching out and asking for help which is what they suggest current struggling new mothers do albeit in a different way.

This essay is an interesting read with information that could be applied to the lives of people from all walks of life. White begins her How-To guide with five steps that anyone regardless of pregnancy status could benefit from.

Below are five steps that will aid you in the process of developing a healthier network: taking stock of social support, naming names for social support, asking for help, persevering in support and keeping reciprocity in mind.

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, in her conclusion White stresses the fact that you should not feel guilty for any negative feelings you have with regard to motherhood. She also illustrates the importance of taking care of yourself in order to offer your baby the best mothering possible.

Make time and energy now to reach out to the support system you already have in place or to begin building and enhancing your support network. By taking one small step at a time you can create a little victory for yourself everyday. Getting what you need enhances your ability to give to your baby. You and your whole family will be off to a healthier start.

Having a social support system is very important period, but especially during a trying experience such as new motherhood. It's a continuing theme in my posts about PPD but I can't help it. PPD is shrouded in unnecessary shame and secrecy and just the knowledge that you are not alone can be a big help in recovering. So hold your head up high, speak out, reach out, ask for help, share your story and remember:

You are not alone. You are not to blame.

A Letter from Mama

Over at A Booblog there is a touching letter that I suggest you read in its entirety. It is a wonderful testament to the importance of talking about PPD. Below are some key excerpts.

Recently, I realized something. If something were to happen to me, my own daughter may not know the truth. She may see this blog some day and think that everything turned out fine. She may some day, have a child of her own. She may some day, struggle with postpartum depression. I would be horrified to think that she might say "well, my own mother dealt with it stoically, therefore I must as well".

Anjukutty, I do not expect us to be friends. Ever. I want to be your mother - the one to guide you and share life with you. But not as your friend. You will have many, many friends in your life. I might be a sort of friend, on a lesser scale, but I will always, always be your mother first. This means that I may tell you things that you do not want to hear. On the other hand, friends have to a tendency to tell you only the things you want to hear. You can always come to me for an honest opinion, that you may or may not desire. But it will be honest and only with pure intentions for I only have your best interest at heart.

I have been taking Zoloft and that has helped. In addition, I am still trying my best to eat healthy, go for walks and keep active while I wait for my body to get back to normal. Reading, writing and knitting have taken on an even greater importance for me as a means for relaxation. Lately, I have felt that I am getting more normal and that my hormones are settling down. I see the light at the end of the tunnel.

She's right to write this letter to let her daughter know she isn't alone if she experiences PPD. There is so little common knowledge out there about postpartum depression. Even though as much as 20% of mothers experience it, many women feel like they are all alone and that there is no "light at the end of the tunnel." No matter what our story is about we have a responsibility to share it. We need each other and your experience matters.

Postpartum Progress

As part of our work with Postpartum Health Alliance, I'd like to highlight a blog called Postpartum Progress.

Written by Katherine Stone, Postpartum Progress is the most widely-read blog in the United States on the subject of postpartum illnesses. Through this blog, Stone offers an amazing variety of resources including books, articles in the media, event notifications, and personal stories of support. Apart from the obvious utility of the resources Postpartum Progress provides, I think perhaps what makes Postpartum Progress so engaging is Stone's ability to be honest when relating painful and private moments of her past including thoughtful discussions about anti-depressants and hospitalization. She has probably saved countless lives just by showing women that they are not alone and that they can get through this difficult time.

If you have ever wanted to become more informed about this important and pervasive issue, Postpartum Progress is definitely the place to start. As a small sampling of Stone's work, I'll leave you with some entries from the Reader's Favorites section of Postpartum Progress.

5 Things Every New Mother Should Know About PPD
Postpartum Depression and the Glint of Judgment
Straight Talk About Hospitalization and Postpartum Depression